The majority of my life is good, I’m happy and truly enjoy myself. But, there are periods where life is not that great and everything around me goes to shit. People driving like idiots, not knowing that the outside lane is for the next turn off on the roundabout and not the third one. Obnoxious hasty idiots tailgating when I’m going 120km on a 120km highway and the left two lanes are full and going slower. Companies making it hard with all their stupid rules and regulations to get anything done or actually get to speak to someone who understands what I need to be done and how simple it is to get it done if only they used their brain. Facebook, one after the other (just like me) is bitching about something. And the list goes on.
It’s a build-up. And then you explode. It builds up and your response to it gets worse and worse.
It’s great and truth be told, everyone needs a bit of shit in their life sometimes, it simply can’t be all roses. If it was, you’d get bored of it and not be able to appreciate the good times. The great thing is that there is a fix for those shitty times because after all, it all comes down to choices, your own choices of:
- What to eat
- How much to eat
- What to drink
- How much to drink
- Whether to worry or not
- What time you go to sleep
- Whether you stay in that shitty job or take a chance
- Whether to exercise or not
- How to respond
The first major contributor to a shitty life starts with what you put inside you when it comes to the sustenance that should be healing, repairing, and providing you with energy. My vice is coffee and alcohol, I love the mood a drink puts me in and the buzz a coffee gives me. I’ll never say I’ll quit forever, but I do know that my moderation of these sustenances are always slipping from one to two, to three, to four, and all of a sudden what was moderation and still considered ok turned into harmful, not just physically but also mentally, I will get to that in a bit.
Not eating way too much has never been a big challenge for me, I do eat for pleasure more than I should which contributes to me having a slab rather than a six-pack. With that said, there are plenty out there who take eating way too far and go to the point of absolutely being self-destroying.
Not worrying is a quality I developed a long time ago when I realized that worrying never did any good, it only provided unpleasant feelings and made things worse than they were. Once you realize that thinking/worrying/negativity is a feeling you give space too then you realize it’s something you can also refrain from. If you say you can’t, is your body and mind not yours? Are you not strong enough? Or do you simply enjoy the feeling it gives?
Sleep is something I value just as much as what I eat or drink and pay attention to. Luckily I sleep like a baby. When I hit the pillow it’s a 3 count and I’m gone and even if I have to go and siphon-the-python then after I drop on the bed and am gone right away. Before I discovered the trick of not-worrying and exercise, I did have some sleepless nights, but now only when there are mosquitos in my room or the neighbors are having a party.
Taking chances and moving away from negativity has been something I’ve also been a fan of for a long time. I see people stay in jobs they hate because they have a mortgage, are paying off the car, or are too afraid to give up the security. Whether I have one life or not is debatable, but even if there were more than one, none should be wasted and I sure as hell don’t intend to waste this one. I don’t care what has to be done if there is re-occurring negativity, it has to go, it has to be removed or I remove myself.
Exercise has always been a part of my life luckily. I don’t see it as a chore either, it’s like breathing, it comes naturally and I love it. I think those that see it as a chore look at exercise more as a means to look better on the outside, bigger muscles, toned, etc. Exercise does so much more for you with my main priority being dignity, maintaining the ability to tie my shoelaces, to carry my own groceries, to run a mile, to climb a mountain, to pull myself up, to avoid obstacles, to go where I can go, and so much more.
How to respond to negativity is something I’m still working on and have improved a lot with in the last few years. I’ve always been a “put yourself in someone else’s shoes” kinda guy, not that I’m always able to do that, but I try. I have learned that response to others plays a big factor in my overall feeling. If I curse at those idiot drivers, I go from worse to worse and know it’s going to end up in road rage. I try to smile. I say try because sometimes it’s just impossible, but as long as the majority of the time I implement the right strategy I’m working toward a happier me.
So, I promised an answer, a way to change what could possibly be a shitty life, but so far it sounds like I’ve just been going on about myself. The answer lies in the info given. For me, it’s up and down, mostly up (and happy with the balance), but if yours is primarily down then the following might help.
If you don’t eat or drink right then not only your gut is affected but your mental state is too. If you don’t sleep right then not only do you not recover properly but your mental state is taking a pounding too, and by ‘mental state’ I mean the ability to think rationally and act the way you really want to/should behave. Quick hasty agitated incorrect decisions are made, decisions that lead you down the rabbit hole, decisions that make you feel worse rather than better. I talk from experience, I’m currently on a 30+ day free of alcohol and caffeine and have noticed huge differences in the ability to think more rationally and behave more in a way that is more beneficial for my overall happiness.
You need to take control. Only you can make the decisions, it’s your choice to be in a dark or happy place. Of course, there are uncontrollable forces that can come into play, but we’re focussing on what you can control.
The world around us has some problems but in general, it’s not shit and how we perceive or respond to it is up to us. I know it may sound like hocus pocus but there really is no pill, you’re the answer, the only answer, you need to seek and heal within. Ok ok, enough, before this gets weird.
— Taco Fleur